Why do people bash others

Rather than accept the instability of a potentially unknowable difference, we choose to hate. Reason 3: Because hatred is energizing. When we feel helpless, frustrated, or disempowered, hating another becomes a way to climb out of those difficult feelings.

We can redirect our personal pain to an external, well-defined target. One who feels empowered, motivated and successful has no need for hatred; they have plenty of energy already. For one who is stuck in listlessness, though, hatred can be a shot in the arm.

Often when I meet with clients who are in the middle of deep anger, I ask them to focus on themselves before thinking of others. The key here is self-care. Since dislike is rooted in a fear of the unknown, perhaps understanding more about where our dislike comes from can help us overcome its influence on our behavior.

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Hatred may also involve the feeling of disgust, and if you are disgusted with everyone, you want nothing to do with them. When you take connectedness and empathy off the table, you definitely reduce your cognitive and emotional coping options. Hatred is a distressing feeling that requires a lot of emotional energy. Distressing feelings often prompt people to seek unhealthy self-soothing behaviors, such as eating comfort foods or using alcohol or other substances to suppress and avoid their distress.

These feelings may also be combined with a tendency to withdraw from healthy activities such as exercising and spending time with supportive friends and family. In that case, that person might eventually experience some long-term consequences of chronic stress, such as systemic inflammation. So, whether through unhealthy self-soothing to cope with the feeling or long-term sympathetic nervous system activation, chronically feeling hatred toward others could adversely affect your health.

Turner suggests some strategies that can be helpful if you feel like you hate everyone:. Frequently experiencing anger, frustration, or discomfort can make you feel like you hate everyone. These emotions can take a toll on your mental and physical health, and make life a lot less enjoyable for you.

Practicing empathy can help you change your mindset and make things more pleasant for you. Struggling with stress? Our guide offers expert advice on how to better manage stress levels. We can be our own worst enemy in these situations, but we can also be the best advocate for caring, helpful, CIVIL, conversation.

Great article. The choice is ours. Thank you, Carey! I found it so helpful to unfollow some angry, political snarky people online. I can find outlets to be informed, but try to be careful to guard my heart and mind from clogging it with junk. Proverbs Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Notify me of follow-up comments by email.

Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. Share via: 20K Shares. Posted in Organizational and Cultural Trends and tagged character , communication , crisis , culture , health , most popular , toxic. Sound like you and others need to go out in the real world. The internet is not real. Rudy Schellekens on November 11, at pm. And yet: children commit suicide because if what is posted in that not-real world.

Mike Megginson on July 6, at am. Sabrina Ingram on September 28, at am. Steven Liersch on July 5, at am. Carey Nieuwhof on July 7, at am. Mike Schmidt on July 3, at am.

Mercaldo on July 9, at am. Kathryn on July 2, at pm. Lanny Heinlen on July 2, at am. T on July 2, at am. Guest on March 14, at am. Jim on July 4, at am. Patricia on January 8, at pm. Carol T. Horton on January 7, at pm. Joanna Keene on August 4, at am. Ken Ballard, Jr. Hey Carey, This is a great article. Rae Daniel on August 1, at pm. Christie on August 1, at pm. Mark Kellerman on August 1, at pm.

Eldonn Brown on August 1, at pm. Fantastic Article! Words of Wisdom! Very Impressive Copywriting skills! I love it! Brent K on August 1, at pm.

Let me explain. Jean on August 3, at am. Well said, Brent. You are not alone in your views. God Bless! Chris Patton on August 1, at am. Carey Nieuwhof on August 1, at am. Thanks Chris. So appreciate your positive voice my friend. Kevin Taylor on August 1, at am. I cannot explain how good and right-on this entire article is. Every sentence. Thank you. Thanks Kevin. Praying for a better day and tone. Kyle Isabelli on August 1, at am.

Mark on August 1, at am. For sure. How we disagree with someone is how we descend into hate. Linda, Liddell on August 1, at pm. Monica on August 1, at am. Colleen on August 1, at am. Melissa on August 20, at pm. Every time I hear that other churches are as crazy as mine, I feel better somehow. Bob on December 5, at pm. Claudia Cumming on May 15, at am. Dennis on May 15, at pm. Jo Ana Davidson on May 14, at am.

Laurie on August 1, at am. Tom on May 9, at pm. There are times when we should fast from phones… Tom. Mark on May 9, at pm. Lynn on May 10, at pm. Cyndy Warnier on May 9, at pm. Robert Buchanan on May 9, at pm. Keri Harvey on May 9, at pm. Joyce Martin on May 9, at am. Excellent article! Karen Chraska on May 9, at pm. Phil S. John smith on May 9, at am.

Rudy Schellekens on May 9, at am. Doug on May 9, at am. Dave Francis on May 9, at am. Phil on May 9, at am. Dan on May 9, at am. Dennis on May 9, at am.